My long hiatus ends. For now.

Oh hey. It's been a while!
I must admit there is no exciting reason for my internet absence other than I simply have not had much extra time. It's really a good thing that I don't blog for a living as I would be flat broke.

I have had so little time to blog as of late that I neglected to show all of you my truly glorious Hampton race photo. You know I rarely miss a chance to show the world how awesome/well dressed/classy I am so this really says something about my schedule.

The pain face. Haahaha wow! There were better pics but why use those when you have THIS?

I'm enjoying counting down to Boston this year as it also means that I'm counting down to Spring. I feel that in 6 weeks we might be seeing temps more consistently in the 40's and, perhaps, will have smashed the snowbanks into submission. I am hopeful but not counting on it!

After a thoroughly less than stellar week of training after Hampton I shaped up for a good one last week.
There was nothing at all wrong with me after Hampton, but I admit that I was quite "over" winter, treadmill running and temps in the teens. I was not a particularly positive person that week but I managed to get over it without loosing friends or injuring anyone.

I also made the less than happy discovery that I did NOT PR in Hampton. *sigh* I probably don't need to admit it but I refuse to be a lying liar who lies so here is the deal: I must be such a derp that when I ran Great Bay a couple years ago I was looking at my gun time, or something. My GBH PR still stands at 1:36:27 F**K. I only noticed this because I looked at athlinks and was basically like "......uh oh....." So damnit, I need to run another fast half. UGH!!

I have had a couple of long runs that have made me feel good about the direction my training is heading in. If there is one thing I have learned over the past year it is that each workout shows me something specfic, useful and different. What I mean by that is that I do not judge my potential marathon speed in my long run, I use that to gauge my overall endurance- which at this time feels better than I expected it to given the treadmill winter. I calculate my speed based on what the numbers say in my speedwork, which I'm reasonably pleased with as well. I do find that another factor is recovery time after a long hard week- and that is the thing I'm the most pleased with. My recovery has been fantastic, to the point where if I was still a young, dumb kid I'd be skipping my rest days (which I most certainly would not do!)

Some post long run shenanigans. Totally normal.

 When I get a second to actually breathe around here I'm going to take a look at my overall training hours for the past month or so. I know that compared to many (or most) marathoners I limit my weekly mileage. It is hard to say if this will be a "forever" thing but for now, I know my body stays healthiest when I am incorporating a variety of strength training and lower mileage than people with my time goals usually put in. Mostly I am curious to see what my weekly totals are in hours rather than miles. Because seriously, marathon training takes up a chunk of the day! *worth it*

So there is the ultra condensed version. I hope to find a little more time to chronicle the lead up to Boston as it's an exciting time. I'm pumped for a few big weeks of training, a big asshole snow storm tomorrow (I'm lying, I could not be LESS excited) and hopefully the arrival of Spring. This winter has been sticking around, being a jerk for long enough!

This is winter, continuing to be a complete shit head.

Marathon Training Cycle #3- What is different this time?

I feel like with only ONE more long run to go and just over TWO weeks until Hyannis that the countdown is officially on!

 

I have been training pretty damn hard for the past couple weeks but feeling good. A little tired (my bedtime should probably be 8:00 from here on out) and hungry as shit but my legs/hips/feet are A-OK. I'm confident that they are going to stay that way and therefore do not feel that I'm jinxing myself! Anyone who read my blog during Marathon training round #1 and #2 knows that I'm typically grievously injured by this time. So this is a new trend!

 

So what has been different this time?

 

Well... Coach Kelsey has kept me the hell in line. And really limited the amount of junk running that I do. Every workout has a purpose and I'm not just meandering around like a dummy running 10 milers at an 8:30 pace daily (yes, I'd be ok with that. my life has been harder lately!)

 

I think y'all know that I almost never give product shout outs on here. But I've had amazing, amazing luck with Aspaeris Pivot Shorts. I had hip pain of DEATH for months on end at the beginning of fall and seriously thought I might never get over it (it kept me up at night, bothered me during every run, had me flat on my back at the Chiro on the regular...) I also had hamstring pain, lower butt pain, side butt pain, pain pain pain....

Anyway. I started wearing these little gems at the beginning of this training cycle and BOOM. It was like my hip/side butt/low butt/hammy had never been a problem. I wear them for running and recovery.

My one complaint is that they are *not* cute and that I don't feel like I could ever wear them without tights or similar... I tend to prance around the house in them shouting "runners lingerie!! sooooo sexy!!" and generally making a spectacle of myself.... Lucky Eric.

 

I figure the lack of cute brought on this adorable color in the Gen2's!
I NEED THESE in an XS! (unavailable, tragic...)

No, Aspaeris did not pay me to say all this stuff. However, they did dig up 3 pairs of XS in the original design shorts and were possibly the best ever customer service so they deserve a legit shout out. (and guys, I really need the Gen2 so whip me up an XS STAT!!)

And yes, like every other runner in the universe I wear pro compression.
I don't need to extrapolate as we all know them and love them.
Lester does too...

In addition to wearing the compression like it's going out of style I have been foam rolling like a BOSS, doing tiny bits of spin/core cross training (like, once a week which is apparently tiny in my world) and the couple of days that my legs have felt BAD I have **GASP** taken the day off.

Seriously, I'm much more fun to be around when I'm not running with my pain face on!

 

If all goes according to plan I'll be toeing the line in Hyannis more fit and less injured that I have ever been at the start of a Marathon. If it wasn't a 26.2 mile race I would be feeling supremely confident but I respect the mileage too much to get cocky. If nothing else, I'm putting the work in and all systems are looking good for a solid race!

Half Marathon Number SIX!

Unless I forgot to blog about some random race then today's little jaunt is number six on the list of Half's that I have run in 2012.

No idea how today is going to go, to be honest, I'm not feeling very fast right now so I estimate that a PR is out of the question. My guess based on recent 5K and 10K sprints which left me gasping like a beached whale lead me to the belief that 1:45 is attainable. I do not think that this will be the day to sub 1:40 AT ALL. And kids, I'm not sandbagging. When it comes to kicking ass at this distance speed work- and lots of it- is my friend. And speed work just re-entered my life after marathoning/shin shit/ foot shit/ long runs taking up my speed work time... Whoops!

I am looking forward to running today and hope to enjoy the race regardless of the outcome.

Let's recap the Half's I have done thus far:

#1: The Indoor Half, a PR at the time...

#2: Half At The Hampton's, not much to say...

#3: Quincy Half, a fairly weak effort.

#4: GBH: Killer PR plus I meet all of my favorite people!

#5: Maine Half: Great race with my favorite boy. Bad weather..

This is the worlds laziest post. And also reconfirms my feeling that this is gonna be a 1:45 kind of day.

I'm clearly a very serious athlete...

 

I have a big-long-epic-awesome blog coming up soon about how to recover from a marathon like a boss (hint: it involves lots of candy..)

 

But for today... This picture from MDI really puts my fashion out there. And IT IS AMAZING!!

 

Someday I'll be famous/fast/award winning enough to have GATORADE or similar in big bold letters on all my garb. But until they come knocking at my door, ready to give my slow poke butt freebies, this is how I plan to dress. Badly.

 

Proof right here. I look like a bag lady!

 

 

In which we kill our last long run.....

I'd like to say as early on as possible that the title of this post is a complete lie. I just did that to get your attention. In reality I should have used one of my other ideas...

A few possible titles for today's post:
In which our last long run kills us......
In which we learn that not all long runs are easy....
In which we narrowly avoid certain death....
In which we try to run for our lives and end up dying on the side of the road....

Do you see a pattern? Anyway, on to the good stuff.

I would imagine that one would hope, wish, pray, beg and negotiate with the running Gods that their last long run pre taper be a good one. I certainly know that I was at 4PM yesterday evening...

I can only hope that a bad dress rehearsal leads to a damn good show in the running world- if not, I'm screwed every which way until Friday. Or, late evening on the 27th of July....!

We had things like the weather working against us- it was 90. And humid. I know that I pregamed like a boss: steadily drinking water all day, smartly eating decent food beforehand, bringing my LARGE handheld and a stash of nasty GU. I talked myself into it big time- I was mentally as prepared as I could have been (despite a bit of complaining) and really thought that we might kill it.

So off I marched to meet up with Danielle at her house to take to the streets of Portland, Westbrook and beyond to dominate everyone and everything and to make running our bitch.

**that was the plan. seriously. game on. big pimpin style**

SO OFF WE WENT!

Despite the intense heat we both felt alright for the first 6 miles. No problems. Except that I totally ran out of water despite the huge bottle. Before mile 6... NOT a good sign...

Topics covered: All of Danielle's Marathon domination, her creepily clanking ankle, the bowl of milk at mile 0.04 that had my initials on it (ok. why won't THAT picture load?) our copious amounts of sweat and how the world is so lucky to have us. Which is a fact.

Emergency Water Stop NUMBER ONE!
Bottom line: There was NO WAY that we could keep up hydration given the amount we were sweating.
Thanks to Danielle's super cute Dad for the H20. Lifesaver...

We ran steadily, although with additional complaining inspirational words of motivation from miles 6-13 with another crisis water stop thrown in there somewhere. Right around the Half Marathon point we both started to come undone in a big way kill it, kill it, and run at a 6:30 pace, sprinting thru red lights and plowing over old people on Jazzy scooters and small children like it was our business...

Topics discussed at red lights which we hoped would last forever: How running sucks, how we literally could not run to save our lives, shark porn, potential vomiting, Oh, and I had to come to a full halt to watch a plane land. Yes I am very cool. We kept shouting things at each other: UGH! DAMMIT! FUCK! I HATE THIS AND I HATE YOU!!! (oops sorry) being the most popular.

I have no idea how we managed to get to mile 22. No. Idea. From mile 13 and on both of us could not have hated life more. I have to give my legs a tiny bit of cred for having (maybe) one decent mile in there. ONE! UGH!

We stopped at Dunks for emergency ice water which I proceeded to plunge many body parts into my cup and basically rub the ice all over myself. In the middle of the store. It was very, very sexy. NOT.

Topics covered: How not to behave in public, how to get sponsored by an amazing running clothing store (um, by behaving better in public perhaps?) How Danielle should push me home in a shopping cart, how neither of us would notice or mind if the other one peed in her shorts- but how the each of us would mind the feeling of having urine soaked shorts.

OMG. We are so awesome.

At the end of the run we had to sneak in something silly like 0.3 miles, which we did by running around and around and around at the end of a road, making airplane arms on the turns. WHY!!? Why.... Oh right, because we are awesome.

Topics Covered by my inner monologue in the last 1 mile: I CAN NOT TAKE ONE MORE STEP. (but could I run 4 more miles if I absolutely needed to.....? yes. but they would EFFING HURT!)

And the normal stuff like;  I wonder if I'm going to throw up? dammit my feet are killing me, how does Danielle's hair manage to look so good after all that??, my clothes are so sweaty that I feel like I have been swimming, are we done? NO.. Are we DONE? NO!!! Are We Done....?? YES....

Holy crapola kids, we look freaking amazing in this picture.
This is why hot running clothes companies should send us merch to pimp...
22 miles of death and still rocking the fashion!
As good as we looked I don't think either of us felt very well.......

Because this happened.
Dead.
Hate Life.
But we are still sexy.

Danielle announced that she was going to drink so much water that she would probably throw up.
I suggested sitting in an ice bath and drinking it thru a straw. Then I was grossed out.
She lay down to die.
I sat down to focus on imminent death and or violent hurling.

I left to die alone and then this happened.

The aftermath: I awoke this morning feeling like I had been hit by a truck and run over several times. The Plan called for 6 recovery miles and I had to call it a day at mile 4 because I was a complete strugglebus. I might have cried.

Luckily 4 bottles of water and a fistful of Advil later I had improved somewhat.

I got a text from Danielle, who basically NEVER feels pain saying that she was still iffy too. I was glad that I wasn't alone in my anguish (although by 2 PM she was texting me to man the eff up and eat some ice cream. dude, I'm lactose intolerant...come on.... :-))

I like this text very much.
We are totally talking ourselves into it, HAH!!

So at this point that's it. Taper time is here and what's done is done. Both of us have made it to this point with only a few bouts of hysteria (mostly mine...) a few broken legs (mostly mine...) and a bunch of man the eff up texts (mostly Danielle's to me....)

19 days... OMG.

Bridgton 4 on the 4th: A race of awesomeness!

This might have been the best race day EVER!
There is no better way to spend a national holiday than getting up at the asscrack of dawn to run a few miles as quickly as humanly possible. I actually mean this, which should come as no great shock to those of you that are familiar with me and my crazy.
I was pretty excited about this years race as a group of us were going to run, and dominate, obviously, at a variety of speeds.
I was nervous and had butterflies threatening to make me vomit due to the fact that I was determined to meet a couple of serious goals.
1) Sub 30. If I did not meet this goal I would have hung up my running shoes and crawled under a rock like a troll, never to come out again.
(yes. I know that trolls live under bridges. I would have just been an especially anti social troll, OK?)
2) Manage to place in the top 10 women. This was a lofty goal and I was absolutely convinced that it was fairly unattainable.

Kate, Angie, Eric, ME, Casey, Sue and Dan.
Our excellent cheering squad of my parents, Kate and Angie's husbands and Angie's Dad took pics, cheered us on and stood in the 58 degree rain for quite some time. We love you guys!!!
PS: Take a moment to admire the various socks. BIG PIMPIN'.

We all managed to get there on time, because we are very organized.

We all looked really, really good because style is the name of the game.

It was determined that we all had varying race plans so we split up, high fived, trash talked and got on with business.

I made a small error and ran the first mile in 6:10. Oops. Excited. I shouted "CALM DOWN STUPID WOMAN" at myself . After 400 weeks of dealing with my stupid shin shit I was pleased to notice that I did not notice it. Apparently sprinting like a complete tool doesn't pain it but running slowly and logically does. WHATEVER.

I did rein it in a little but kept up a decent pace throughout. I chased down two girls and a bunch of guys and just tried to stay with the front-ish of the pack people. It rained enough to make me not notice the copious amounts of sweat cascading down my body, which was nice. It also rained enough to make me want to hurry to the finish which was excellent motivation.

Overall, I pushed as hard as I damn could and hated my life a little bit but not as much as I sometimes do. Which can be a very, very lot...

WOW. PAIN FACE. I'm cranking. Totally going to chick those boys.

I cruised thru the finish in 26:53. Goal completed. Balls to the effing walls. I totally wanted to dry heave everywhere was cool as a cucumber, (but got my shit together) quickly enough to find my Dad and see Eric run thru the finish in just over 30:00. The blue argyle socks were easy to spot in a crowd of boring dressers....

Both of us ran back to track the rest of the crew down.

We saw Sue power for the finish and cross the line in 35:48- in her FIRST RACE EVER!!

We totally missed Kate in her bedazzled top who ran in in 36:46 despite the fact that she got cut off at mile 1 and badly twisted her knee...

Somehow we also missed Casey and Dan who finished right around the 38 minute mark. (this is very impressive for Miss Casey as she kind of hates running. silly child!)

We DID see Angie though, who beat her goal of 45:00 by a LOT and finished like a boss on 41:18!

It was a hell of a good day for all of us.

I did manage to meet my top 10 goal as well, with a 4th place overall woman's finish. Dear Mizuno, I am a legit scary runner, please sponsor my feet and send me some sweet new kicks!

So overall it was a damn good day on the racing front. Everybody beat their time goal, nobody threw up and then we all went home to ice our legs, sit around in compression socks and demand to be waited on and to be fed PB&J's. Oh that was only me? Whoops....

Look at lucky Eric. Big Pimpin with all the cute ladies...
We all look pretty damn good for running so fast.!!
It's ok to hate all of us for our undeniable good looks, fashion and fabulocity...!

202 Miles. Big Pimpin'.

I ran 202 miles in June. UGH!!!!!!!!!

Highest mileage month ever, beating out May which was 194 and at that time was a HUGE month for me by many, many miles..

When I run that many miles I start getting perma-pain face as seen in following picture.

It seems that this is my perma expression while running, due to the fact that I am in a bit of pain, and am also a little tired. Luckily, my amazing outfit destracts from the agonized grimace upon my face.

Luckily as well, I don't look like that in real life. I am afflicted with IRL permagrin, so there...!

Perma Pain. OUCH.
But I'm flying, holy crap!

Officially counting down (in terror) to the marathon on the 27th.
I have one more long run this coming weekend and then I start backing off on the mileage.
If I was not so cool, hip, amazing and big pimpin I would be scared shitless. Luckily I am all those things so I'm relaxed, calm. collected and dismissive. HAH! LIES!

I'm running a 4 mile race on the 4th with a great group of people who can plan to eat my dust :-)
I kid, I kid! Sort of... Hoping to lay the smack down and set a course PR for myself. We shall see!

IT HAPPENED!!!

SUB FREAKING TWENTY BABY!!!!!!

By the skin of my teeth- in 19:59 but I WILL TAKE IT!!!

And this, after several epic declarations that there would be NO PR on this particular evening. Instead of my "normal" Wednesday 5K My Sister and I did the Twilight 5K. Bottom line, it's a great race and we have had several family members and close friends loose their battles with cancer in the past two years so supporting this cause means a lot to us.

But. It's a twisty, winding, narrow course with a freak staircase and a couple little hills. More of a challenge than scampering around back cove... Not PR friendly when you're chasing a fast time.

Before. Looking bright and non sweaty!

This was my sister's FIRST race since we ran that 4 miler together years ago. Since then she has had a pretty horrible series of back problems and has only just been able to return to running. So this was a big exciting day!

Bottom line, I had a good run. Not much more to say about that. I ran under the clock in 19:32 and since I started at the front of the pack I can't figure out where those extra seconds came from but who cares. It hardly shattered my Olympic non-dreams.

After I finished I ran back a ways and found the Sis who was still looking strong! We cruised along and she finished really well in just over 29:00- and since sub 30 was her goal she nailed it!



After: Looking bright and sweaty!

We should have stuck around for awards because I ended up being the 3rd overall woman and winning my age group. And, even better for my competitive nature, I snagged a top 10 overall placing with an 8th place finish. Um, hello? Who is this speed demon??

So definitely a solid race for both of us. I finally snagged the elusive sub 20 which makes me feel pretty legit. Not to mention the fact that I clearly looked super good doing it in my subtle and neutral outfit (look at us. it's like a genetic thing??) I'd say that my Sis is going to be afflicted with race-itis now that she's back into it and will be giving me a run for my money in the near future. We had fun!

Anyway... We drank a beer. High fived several times. Got chilly. And left to eat the biggest dinner ever because that's how we roll... The End.

In which we learn that 22.8 miles is long & hard...

Continuing on in a VERY Big Pimpin' Training plan manner I trundled on out on Friday afternoon to sneak in a 22 miler.

I'm not sure if one really "sneaks in" a 22 miler, being that it takes up a big chunk of the day, requires a certain amount of strategic planning and pre hydration nonsense. We all know that my "strategic planning" consists of items such as: "Can I take cookies?" "Why is my handheld leaking and do I care?" "what is the appropriate number sunblock for my ghastly ghost pale skin? and "who will give me beer when I am done??" When I had reasonable answers to those pressing questions I headed out. 

The Route. 22.8, please take note.

Unfortunately I had a few issues from the get go which made the run less than spectacular. I still have so much trouble hydrating on the go because I get a horrible side stitch that creeps its way up into my ribs. Very distracting ans usually results in feelings of anger. My handheld was leaking like CRAZY which baffled me- but honestly wasn't the only reason that I ran out of fluids at mile 8. (I was the other culprit for drinking, duh...)

Basically around mile 8 I realized that it was NOT going to be an easy run. At this point my legs were already feeling fairly crappy- which is really, really unusual as 8 is pretty much like a rest day. Complete strugglebus, UGH!  I was afraid that an epic mental breakdown was moments away... I really sucked it up and told my brain to eff off. So I took some mental notes of amusing things that happened...

Let's review:

-Got honked at A LOT. I have decided to deal with the shenanigans and play it up by showboating. World, you are welcome for all the awesomeness that I bring to the road Ahem.

-Some guy did a wheelie on his motorcycle RIGHT IN FRONT of me going about 180 MPH. I was scared and hence, not impressed. I don't think this falls in the category of "how to impress me" anyway. How TO impress me is a story for another day.

-I helped push a broken down car out of the street. Cross training??

-Got chased by a dog. AGAIN. Not cool...

-At mile 14 sent some texts. This was a good idea. Always good to get moral support from a friend (who just happen to be in a tub of ice) to push thru the pain and agony! Win!

-Ran into Angie's house at mile 18 to get a drink. And tell her that I was hurting and possibly going to hurl. FAIL!

 And now, all together, let's take note of the fact that I am clearly violently against posting pictures of myself that are anything less than horrifying. It makes me laugh.


After putting in the final 4.8 (and did I ever hate that 0.8) I face planted in her lawn.
I. WAS. DONE! 22.8. In the books...

Despite the general agony of the day and not feeling so great AND trying to go slow my pace was still 8:30. After drinking a giant bottle of water and eating an entire sleeve of crackers I felt better.

And had a beer. Thank you.

It took a few minutes to get up.
I said the eff word VERY MANY times.
Because when prone on the lawn why wouldn't one drop righteous F-bombs?

I went home and threw on my sexiest socks.
Then put legs up a wall, then in a bucket of ice.
Because that is what cool people do on a Friday night.

I'm glad that I got another long run in and didn't expire in the process. I'm pleased that my head space didn't take a horrible turn towards "OMG I SUCK I'm GONNA DIE I HATE EVERYTHING" for more than an hour or two a minute. I'm thrilled that my fashion is fab enough to inspire many people to whoot and honk at me... And I'm glad that I didn't get run over by that tool on his motorcycle.

The End.

Big Pimpin': how to dress to get catcalled...?

After last week's long, long run of 18 (which I managed despite the fact that it was just. so. hard. that's what she said... ohhh...) I was glad that for this week and next week the long runs are shorter. I was supposed to do 10 but my weekly mileage looked like such pathetic shiz that I added 3 in order to feel legit. It was a much better run than last week.
Honestly, this week was only so-so. I thought my mileage was a little low and I struggled a bit like a lame, old, out of shape, emphysemic woman. **sigh** But I got it done.

First sunny day since 1979!
Per the norm the first 10 were easy as pie...
Avert your eyes from the ghastly pale I mean dead sexy legs. I shouldn't be let out in public...!

The last 3 honestly weren't bad either other than my toe started gushing blood.
Nice...
Nothing says "fun" like a hemorrhaging toe...

In the course of 13 miles I got "whoo-whoo'd' multiple times.
I can only imagine that it was done in jest, come on people!!!
I know I bring an unprecedented level of hot but...
Whatevs. It's the sparkly shorts. Or the odd knee muscles that I didn't know I had?
I like my slight expression of horror in this pic. Daayum, I am the coolest....

Round Two of Big Pimpin' Training

In which we discuss Big Pimpin' Long Runs!
Big Pimpin' Recovery strategy!
Big Pimpin' Fashion, per the norm....

I'm wicked tough but this 18 mile run over some kinda mountain made me want to cry.
This was in no way easy but I did it.
And it really was 18. Not 17.9. Silly imap app not correctly calibrated.
Longest run ever. EVER. ever.....

The aftermath of said run.
This also explains why I am so damn popular.
"Want to come over for compression tights and icing time? no? gosh, why ever not??"
Hmmmmm. Sexy and I know it.

This is not a good photo but it's important to mention that style is important.
My hair matches my fav running shoes.
Did I do that on purpose? no. I actually did not.
But it's big pimpin hair style for shizzle.

Big Pimpin' Training, 95 Days to go!

The Theme for the upcoming Marathon Of Insanity is...
BIG PIMPIN' (glad to have such a logical theme)







Big Pimpin. The way I roll.

What? Since WHEN???

Since now? Yeah!

Nice gloves there ya tool.... 10 miles. OK

How I felt about the first 5... UGH...

 I haven't bothered running any farther than 13.1 since that 16 miler that I did in NH back in.... January? Dudes, that was so long ago that I don't even remember how it played out (that's a complete lie. I remember every step.)

Time to man up around here if I intend to run 26.2 mother trucking miles in 14 weeks and not embarass myself terribly. Which could happen even if I do train like a boss. I embarass myself on a daily basis because I'm pretty much an clumsy doofus....!

It was a pretty great day to run- 49 degrees and downright damp. Hence, the tights made a comeback along with gloves that probably belong to one of my second grade students. I wore my rainy day shoes which have 1200 miles on them (no lie) and my feet are a rather bloody mess now- bad choice (will remember that...)

The first 3 miles were an agonizing death march. Just awful. Legs junk. I felt incompetent. Inept. Impotent, even... Downright dreadful. Appalingly agonizing. Horribly Horrendous. I could continue indefinately with the alliteration but will cease in order to try to keep everyone from unfriending me.

What the hell? OK here's the hell: Had a long week. It was not that fun. Kinda tired... Wore heels last night for a long-ish time and that always kills me... Had almost 2 days off (early, early run on Friday- this run was on Sunday mid-Day). Took a bit just to get going but THEN, things were GOOD. Like, really good considering that 15 miles is about 14 too many no matter how you look at it! I was pretty pleased with clumsy, uncool self. Went home and sat on some frozen veg and contemplated my fabulocity (that line of though lasted point two seconds then I thought geeky thoughts about nerdy things per the norm...)

Anyway.

I might be able to do this.
(might)

              



Running with my BFF or... Fashion FAIL!

Warning: If you do not wish to witness possibly the worst fashion that this blog has ever seen shut 'er down now.
Prepare to experience feelings of jealousy in my/our ability to dress ourselves. Or, feelings of horror/nausea!

This is my BFF. Since I am the Pied Piper of the running world here in the lovely vicinity of my-town Maine she has taken to chasing me around lately.
I get that a lot....
Because I am fun. Well dressed. hip. And shout NO STOPPING!!!
Which the BFF is clearly delighted about. Silly girl.
Would ya look at that little subtle gesture..... (just look at it!)

I'm not soing to lie and say that this outfit was an accident.
Oh no, a challenge was thrown down (not by me! oh no!) to put together the most heinous, rape repellant, clashing, eyeball burning outfit that could be managed.
I win.
Look at our muscles. Want tickets to the gun show??
Oddly, we both look to be about to punch ourselves in the faces. That's weird...

Man do we ever look good.
BFF has only been running for a few weeks so has had little time to assemble dreadful looking running attire. Once she becomes used to high mileage weeks she'll start buying everything off the last-years-worst-color bargain rack. Like yours truly...
I honestly want to cover my eyes when I look upon what I am wearing. That is the worst thing that I have ever seen. BFF looks straight off the fashion page compared to me- UGH HAHA!

Off we run! EPIC! BFF is about to run her FIRST 5K NEXT WEEKEND!!!!
Very proud of her and actually seriously pissed off that I'm busy and can't run by her side. I'm sure she'll kick it in the teeth though becasue she's a badass mo' fo'...!! Love her face...

In which many running questions are answered...

Hey look! Another picture of me looking dejected... Caught by the running paparazzi looking as though I'm about to hurl upon my shoes. (I'm not actually. people who as as awesome as I am simply can not be bothered to blow massive chunks upon their purple kicks. ahem...)
I had just finished up a 10 miler, which simply should not be a big deal. BUT. IT. WAS. It was essentially a death march and I was in NO way pumped about it. YUCK. (running, we are in a big fight today...)
But I digress.
This is kind of a bonus post for this week but I thought the most recent round of pictures present the opportunity to answer a few pressing quesitons.
(question "a" being "did you vom" a: NO..)

Q: How many miles does it take for me to consider a run to be legit? As in, worth slapping on 3 horribly conflicting shades of purple for (gahd woman, get a mirror.)
A: While I might be saying 10 in this picture since that I what I managed to get my stupid jerk legs to haul me thru yesterday the answer to this question is 6. I have a profound dislike for wasting perfectly good (semi clean, even) (and color coordinating!) running attire on anything less than that...

Q: Man Sara, you clearly love to run! You must always feel so awesome about it! Puppies! Kittens ! Rainbows! Freaking unicorns!

A: (eff off)

Just kidding. Just kidding. (but really, eff off..!) Look at my FACE. Do I look pumped? Do I look FAB? NO! Honestly though, I like running 99% of the time. The other 1% I hate its guts and think that running is the biggest ass**** that I have the pleasure of knowing.

And bonus Q since I have heard this one 300 times this week:

Q: How did you manage to go from a 1:51 1/2 to a 1:36 1/2 in TWO weeks??

A: I didn't. Not at all. The truth of the matter is that 1:45 was where I was comfortable before last Saturday (which, while awesome wasn't exactly cozy comfy awesome sauce...) But here's how:

-I worked long and hard and (that's what she said...)

-I was shamed into speed work. At Hampton my running friend pointed out the painful obvious that if I did it I'd get used to it. Fricking revalation there for Miss Genuis.... Oy! PALM! FOREHEAD!

-I'm running a lot. Period.

-Rather simple, and (sadly) no shortcuts or magic elixer (but if you have one I'll take it...)

On a side note: I had a whole post prepped to talk about that super cute new Nike ad (the "I'll run to you ad) but can't imbed the video link. Anyway- it's all over the interwebs so go watch it and get the warm and fuzzies. (or the crabby and hatefuls, depending on how you roll...)

In which I show you how to master the recovery run... And fashion?

Post Legendary Half Marathon I thought it seemed wise to dress in my finest, expose (once again) a modicum of my horribly heinous pale legs and hit the road for a recovery run. As you can see, I was so sore and tired (not to mention nastily full due to gorging on Easter candy) that my heart was, perhaps, not in it. Drama, much??

Apparently I went from crying to my sister's dog to beating fists upon her island. Just to clarify: This is NOT head/desking (which is truly an expression of extreme frustration.) This is simply fist/islanding and is rather self indulgent.

I thought that maybe the best choice would be to bail on the run and just steal some beers. So tempting, as beer really washes away the taste of about 12 pounds of cadbury eggs and sour jelly beans. Snap, my poor belly.... I also thought that a beer or two paired with a righteous fistful of advil might help to quell my upper butt and calf pain...

Upper butt pain. Yeah, go ahead and take a LOOK AT IT. That's my butt. Thanks go to Lululemon for making it internet friendly... And sweet baby Geezus, would ya check out my damn calf muscles. Good gravy! Why can't I balance those things out with some bigger boobs???

I sucked it up and ran 6 miles. So slowly. Molasses in January is damn speedy compared to my laborious lumberings and tedious trundlings.... UGHHHH. Then I spent some quality Easter time icing the HAAA-YOUGE legs and (finally) drinking a beer.

And THAT is how to do a recovery run up right!

Great Bay Half Marathon!!

Clearly this picture is worth 1,000 words because simple verbiage could not do justice to the EPIC fashion that we Mainers display. Thanks to the Danielle from Ooh Breathe, Just Breathe for hooking me up with the layers. Cos man, it was damn cold at the end of that race!

OK. For those of you who just want to stop reading now and move on with your Easter Sunday here it is:
My OFFICIAL TIME for the dreaded GBH: 1:36:40
115th place, 4th age group, 15th place woman..... SHOOT!

Yes, you read that correctly. ONE hour THIRTY SIX minutes (THIRTY SIX! SQUEE!) And FORTY EFFING SECONDS!

And as we say, BOOM goes the DYNAMITE.

I probably need to say no more, but say more I will.

I threw all my crap, sans warm clothing into my car and left. And still arrived late. VERY late...

Just take a look at all that crap in my car before we move on....

I was excited to meet Danielle, as mentioned, because we only know each other on the internet (the internet is where I am cool. she is cool in person too!) She had a couple friends in tow who are insane and training for an Ironman. Hardcore shiz. Since we had approximately 30 seconds from the time I graced Newmarket with my presence to the race start we left the chatter for later and hit the ground running. (next time, I will attempt to be less of a late arriving jerk. I simply do not have my act fully together...)

OK y'all. You know the feelings that I've had for the GBH since last year. We don't have a warm, cuddly relationship. I pretty much got it in my head that the GBH sucks giant, hairy balls... Giant, hairy, smelly, SWEATY BALLS!!! Sure, I'm in good shape right now and felt like a PR was possible but maybe not so much on the side of the fricking mountain. UGH!

I started off at a much more brisk pace than in previous Half's but I have been working on that and it was part of the PLAN..
At mile 0.5 I passed the 8 minute mile pace group and knew I had it in the bag.
OHHHH! Let's all laugh about that now becasue at mile 0.5 I know that I have nothing in any bag, the bag is still empty. EMPTY! (but I did know that as long as they didn't pass me, a PR was a guarantee.)

So I ran the damn race.

And it was PERFECT. I zoned out and daydreamed for about 7 miles, no lie. At mile 7-ish it occured to me that I still felt excellent and could run faster. So, I did. And I passed the 7:30 pace group about 1.5 miles later. SNAP.

Around mile 11 or so I met Danielle coming the other way movin' right along with her hair looking annoyingly perfect (I need tips) we high fived and she yelled out words of encouragement, to which I responded with some sort of grunt or groan or non-word word. Talking and running at the same time- not a skill I have (or, my manners are just crap?)

I finished. (I could have kept going... hmmmm) I saw the clock and, like the cool, smooth, has shit together girl that I am BURST into tears like a complete tool. So there I am at the finish, on the grass, head on knees weeping like a silly little school girl..... I need to work on my fabulocity because that isn't cutting it!

All my newfound friends finished right in the 1:48 range which is just insanely fast. (I think they might have had a fight on the way home about who beat who and such...?) We ate pizza. Put on 1,000 layers. Drank a beer. Talked about how the internet rules our lives. It was fun.

And THAT was the story of how I KICKED GBH in the face and scored a 9 minute PR.
CRAZY....

Cohasset 10K, a story in pictures

Instead of a logical little pre race shake out run my cousin Evan and I went hiking. Then unicycle riding...
Some epic pre-race fashion....

Snagging a little pic with the finish...

Pre race, cool and cloudy...

Big crowd = bright shirts so we could find each other!

Walking towards my family after finishing in 44:01- PR big time....

Evan nailed his 1st 10K with a 48:38- CRAZY FAST! (his Dad is my running Uncle!)

Out of order (oops!) About a quarter mile after starting- passing by my terrific family!

Shoot, look at the kid flying thru the finish!!

DONE! YAY!

Me: 44:01, 82nd overall, 3rd Age group (30-39)

Evan- 48:38- 210th overall KICKASS First 10K!!