What I learned in 2012

2012.

It was quite a year, wasn't it?

I have a post New Years recap of 2012 planned, but for now... A few important things I learned.

 

This is what happens when you over train.
That was the most important thing I learned in 2012.

But despite the over training I discovered that I am, shockingly, capable of running 26.2..

We discovered that Jazz Hands are my go-to-pose...
We also discovered that I will say "yes" to almost all bad ideas. 25K trail run anyone?

This is true.
One does not simply marathon into anywhere, duh...

Running is always better with friends.
After being the #1 loner for years I now have a posse.

It was discovered that races without chip timing, I always line up in front.
AND LOOK PISSED!!!! HAH!! DON'T MESS!!!



I can run a sub 20 5K. UGH!
Don't need to do THAT again...

Clearly, it was the year about running with friends.
Running is always better with your best friend!!

And it's always good to have your other best friend there for moral support!

Happy New Year everyone!

Things I learn Along the way...

Things that I learn along the way.. Part. Two? Three? Twelve? Who knows!

1: Last summer I discovered that I simply did not have time to run as much as I wished to. I felt guilty about this, overdid it when I had time and hurt myself badly enough to have to take about 5 weeks off. I remembered all of this (because I am so wise) and tried hard not to repeat the chaos this year. So far, success.

2: Life comes in this order:
a: Work
b: Work
c: other things, like family stuff and the thing I like to call running
d: blogging (don't know how y'all manage to do it daily or even weekly!)

3: Every run does not have to be epic. It does not have to be hill work, speed work, a 10 miler, or even need to feel very good (and believe me, it doesn't.) NEXT year I will remember these words of wisdom!

4: Apparently I can still run a 23:14 5K with no practice. Maybe I just WON'T practice!

5: However. If one wishes to PR in a 10K or if one has a Half on the brain then practice is advisable (so sad.)

6.a: If the run actually feels good keep running in the manner of Forrest Gump. What could happen!? (see words of wis #1...)

6.b: Hmm. So this year I can spontaniously bust out some decent mileage and feel fine. I wonder if it has to do with all the miles I put in last winter and muscle memory? It is like that with horses- once they lay down a base of muscle structure they can get back to hard work quickly after some down time. Well, much faster then when you bring them into good condition the first time around at any rate. Is it like this with people? Who the hell knows...

There are my words of wisdom.
The End.

Top 10 for 2010

After days of proving to all of you that I can do whatever I want with my blog (as in, ramble on about my dog and the weather) I'm finally back on track with a post about real running. Or whatever it is that I do- real SLOW running? (real FAST walking?) Whatev, you're all jealous of my uber speedy marathon time. (as in: average 5K. Again, WHATEV!) HA!

My Top Ten Best/Funny/Fab running moments from 2010:
Cos I'm the Letterman of the interwebs (and (ahem) so original.)

10-Being able to see most of my town from a whole different point of view. I live in a beautiful place and running around has made me appreciate where I live more than I already did. (awwww! how sappy!!)

9- My Epic Comeback at the October race. 2 runs after the shin splint fiasco and BOOM! PR. It's only because the Infamous Coaching Staff was threatening to leave me there if I didn't hurry back to get them out of the FREEZING weather!

8- The 4 on the 4Th where it occurred to me NOT to run like an idiot! This was a startling revelation, and was a few races in the making (hey, better late than never suckers!)

7- My first race, running like a complete idiot and living to tell the tale.

6- Finally getting back out on the road after a million weeks off from the shin splint of doom. That was a good feeling!!

5- Running in the downpour over July 4Th weekend. Having strangers offer me rides home and saying "sorry, I don't get into cars with strangers" like I was in 1st grade... But still, you never know!

4- The helpful local Fast Yellow dog, running with me in an unauthorized way last week. Me: "Go home you **##@@**" Dog!!!" Him: "I love you temporarily! You can be my master!!!" Me: "No, just.... No."

3- The kid with the bow staff, fighting "his imagination" as I ran by. One of the best roadside things that I have ever seen. You really had to be there...

2- "Run Fatty, run!" Shouted from a passing car over Memorial Day weekend. Tourists! Gosh!

1- Taunting the guy in front of me during a July race "I'm gonna get you MISTER!!!" then having him nearly kick my ass. Made for an epic finish line photo shoot.

1- TIE! (Because I can) My comments on my active trainer excercise log. Gems like this after a good run after a short hiatus make me smirk and giggle: "Because after 9 days off, 67,987 calories of pudding, lobster, tequila, crab dip, and mud pie WHY THE FRICK NOT.
And I kicked ass." HAHA. Once more proving that I am pretty awesome... Clearly!

Clearly, 2010 was a year of great success and competitive mastery. Hmmmm. At the very least it was most certainly a year where trying something new (running, duh) proved to be both entertaining and exhilarating. (for the most part. )

Stay tuned for the top 10 EPIC FAILS of 2010. That will be a good list for sure!

Things I see while running in my town. Part 2.

As you may have already noticed I tend to be exceptionally observant while on my runs.

I like to think that this is because of my quirky and inquisitive nature and not that I am being lazy and taking time to smell the proverbial roses.....

(and yes, I did post a couple months ago about the various bits of trash that I noticed. Needless to say, they were hard to miss...)

Lately I have been noticing more in the way of activities, or scary objects and slightly less rubbish in the ditch.

Today's Stories:
THE RAPE VAN
Oh alright, you and I both know that it is most likely a van for a roofing contractor or similar but something about the windowless double back doorness of it just screams Silence of The Lambs. Did I just date myself? Perhaps... However, I avoid this van in the same way that I avoid cholera. I will run completely off the road, up a hill into the puckerbrush and thru the swamp to avoid getting close enough to this vehicle to be snatched, thrown in a well and told "it rubs the lotion on its skin... Jeepers, so scary! I am waiting for the day when this van leaves town so that I can run a straight line down the road again. Until then, no amount of logic and reason will cause me to run any closer to it than is absolutely required by the lay of the land. Kthanxbye.

THE STREET FIGHTER
I live in a town where crime is a rare thing. I have never heard of the cops having to come around and break up a gang of street fighters, or much else to be honest.
You can imagine my surprise when I came running around a corner one day and heard the distinct sounds of some kind of battle being waged just out of my line of vision. As I neared the scene of the crime there was no doubt about it: somebody was getting his arse kicked... I was having visions of myself having to pull off a heroic rescue (or, running for my life while calling 911) Then..... The perps came into my vision. And there he was, one boy of about 13 years old violently beating with a bow stall his enemy: HIS IMAGINATION!
Creeping to a crawl I looked at him, agape. Unimpressed by my curiosity said boy continued his quest to take down his imaginary foe, grunting, sweating and swinging his staff wildly around.
I thought to suggest that he take his Dungeons and Dragons to the backyard, perhaps slightly off the street but chose to keep my words inside and to quietly enjoy the spectacle....

Just one more reason (and a less scary one that the Rape Van) that running in my town is always a fun adventure...

Sometimes I am wrong. Rarely, but it happens....

I guess I just need to shut the heck up?

After my agony yesterday morning, my gloomy predictions of epic humiliating failure, and my repeated bashing of my head off my desk as I imagined my last place finish, this happened.

I SET A PR!!

Oh no you didn't!!

23:00. After 6 weeks off. 3 runs. A lot of moaning and groaning.

It WAS EPIC. 22nd place overall, and 2nd place female finisher. That really pissed me off but there was no catching the other girl in my current feeble and jiggly condition (13 seconds is insurmountable.)

It was freezing (very unusual for a race day...) 60+ MPH winds for the last mile made things oh so delightful and easy. Like running into cozy comforting arms (of an angry, bitchy nor'easter that is.) Pretty decent sized crowd all of whom looked taller, faster and fitter than myself.

I'll catch up on some details later- like the new shoes I wore, my profound thoughts and feelings (ha ha) and other juicy details. But after yesterdays pre race pity party I wanted to update with the shocking news of my re-entry into the racing world and subsequent success!

Go me. I'm cool.

You're not a REAL runner unless....

"Real runners run Marathons or Half's. 5 and 10K's are just sprints or a fun few minutes for distance runners, and anybody can do one one of those with no training at all."

Really? I mean, REALLY??

Perhaps it is because I'm middleaged. Maybe it is because I took up running late in life. Or maybe I just don't know what I am talking about!

BUT HERE IN THE REAL WORLD a 5k is a worthy accomplishment, and a 10k is a big goal for big fricking dreamers like myself. (I do agree that a 5k is an attainable goal for even the most out of shape- but it does require some work!)

Yes, in the long run I would love to and plan to, run a half marathon. Perhaps in 2011 if life doesn't not get in the way. But does the fact that my running resume only contain 5K's mean that I am not a real runner? I certainly don't think so (well, right now after the 6 week recovery from the shin of doom I'm no runner. but I was and will be again stat.)

I just laughed off this silly comment from an otherwise well meaning acquaintance but it stung enough to make me reflect on the absurdity of such an offhand comment.

Maybe all of us can't to the 26.2. But we're still runners, damnit.

Important lesson learned and a big long talk about my feelings...

I'm finally fully recovered from the Shin Splint of Doom, back from vacation, done with my competitive season in my other sport and ready to get back to it.

How do I feel?

-Honestly a little bummed. I wish that I had had the common sense to take a week off when my leg first started bugging me and had saved myself the 6 weeks of recovery time. A lesson learned, I suppose. The final feeling on the injury is that it was not sustained from the accident but rather trying to gimp/run around post trauma. A great big DUH to myself and my stupid over achieving head.

-I am extra disappointed because had I not been shin splinted I would be looking forward to my first 10K on October 11. I had signed up for it and was really feeling like my OH 10 running goal would have been met. I simply can not see that there is a logical reason for running that race unless I feel like being crippled for another long period of time. So I will not do it.

-The race season in my area seems to be winding down. There are a few fall races and Holiday events but it will be snowing in about 5 minutes and that effectively shuts down the running community.

-BUT. Amidst all my negativity there are some good things too. I clearly learned a valuable lesson about listening to my body a heck of a lot better. In the long run this setback won't make any difference because I'm certainly not training for the Olympic trials or similar.

However, I'm sure that other type A people can understand the frustration of a set back such as this!! RAWR!!

I'm going out for an easy walk/run this afternoon. I'm sure it won't be pretty but it will be a step in the right direction- of putting the left foot in front of the other- faster than I have been for quite a while.

Trash Talk

I have found that running around my town has made me appreciate many things about it. It is quiet (for the most part) has beautiful views, pretty lakes, quaint little towns and that good old fashioned small village feel.

Other things I notice while running, not to include the crumbling shoulders of most of the roads in town....

-The usual trash on the roadside. Dunkin Donuts cups, Bud cans, cigarette cartons. It makes me want to drag a little cart along with me and clean up after the slobs. Like a Small town Sherpa, cleaning up our little Mt. Everest!

-Now the more interesting.... Ladies Underwear. Several pairs!! WTF??

-One condom. Sweet Baby Geezees, I wasn't getting within 10 feet of THAT thing!! (sadly, I already was. Almost stepped on the slippery little sucker. Bllllergh!)

-While walking yesterday I noticed a discarded used pregnancy test. I assume from the same person who first lost their knickers on the roadside and then flung the condom from the window?? I chose not to investigate the results of this test. Disgusting.

It seems as though my hood is a hot, steamy place where people take their affairs to the streets and limited shoulders of our poor town. I'm sure they think that their left behind items will go unnoticed.... Evidently they had not counted on the keen eyes of certain middleaged runners?

The day I learned many valuable lessons and killed my Ipod...

Spontaneity is not my middle name. Occasionally in non athletic or non work related pursuits I throw caution to the wind, leap of the edge of the proverbial cliff and rebel against the world (doing something WILD like staying up to the ungodly hour of 9PM! Oh crap, I'm a badass rock star!) When it comes to real life I tend to walk from point A to point B with nary a squiggle between. Those are my Type A, First Child, Scorpio, and clearly FABULOUS tendencies coming out.
I had a good solid plan for prepping for the 4 miler on the 4th of July. So nobody was more surprised than I when the week before I signed up super last minute for a 5K. In reality I felt obligated due to the fact that it was friends of mine who were hosting the event and it was for a great cause. I determined that it was my moral and civic duty to attend and do well so off I went.
The conditions were dramatically different from those on the day of my first race. At 9AM it was turning into a hot day and was quite humid (to add insult to injury.) The weather had been warm for a while so I felt fairly acclimated but in reality it snows for 11 months out of the year where I live so acclimation is relative. Relatively impossible... In perperation I removed every acceptable article of clothing and declared myself ready to run like a Kenyan!
It was a small crowd (57 starters) and I knew almost everyone. For no apparent reason I was feeling more nervous than usual which was absolutely ridiculous because this was not an Olympic event. Regardless, I had a pretty funky case of the butterflies which were most unappreciated.
Out of the group I honed in on one lady, a bit older than myself but in 100% better shape. She was buff like WHAT! She had abs of steel and was clearly a very advanced runner who was going to be impossible to catch. She made me feel skinny and pale.....
The small gathering of future marathon champions got off to a nice start, myself included. Abs was leading the pack like some kind of tiny woman on futuristic steroids and due to my odd case of nerves I was just behind her in the leading bunch of people. My adrenaline carried me thru the first mile at a sickening 6.03 which made me feel very worried.
At mile 1.5 Abs and I were running elbow to elbow and were hot on the heels of the (male) leaders (no catching them... jerks...) I was definitely feeling the unpleasant side effects from my retardedly brisk start and had a feeling that Abs wasn't faring all that much better. The humidity was shockingly intense and the course which had looked elementary on paper was starting to feel like a sprint up Mt. Everest.
I got about 3 steps in front of Abs and hit the most ridiculous brick wall that I had ever felt. It was horrible and I hated everything about it, despised running, and thought that vomming, passing out or stopping was the wisest choice. None of which transpired because I'm insane.
I soldiered on. My inner monologue became very disjointed and bizarre. Things were just a bit.... Off. I determined that I had hit a large and mysterious piece of plastic wrap and it was doing its damndest to stop me, or to cause me to suffocate in a slow and painful manner. Egads!
Somehow despite the fact that miles 2-3 took me 9 minutes each I managed to squeak thru the finish line 3 seconds ahead of Abs and secure the 1st place ladies finish. (later to find out that Abs was a super nice lady and indeed, a very good runner who I managed to catch on an off day.) My finishing time was 23:19 which was fine considering the Hell that I passed thru getting there.
Bottom line, I learned several valuable lessons on this day of Doom which made me revise my plan for the 4 miler.

Lesson 1: Stop running like a chicken on crack for the first mile. Just Stop. Can't do it.
Lesson 2: What I was eating for breakfast- which was my "go to"meal of choice in my other sport was not gonna cut it for running.
Lesson 3: My Uncle Who Runs told me to cowboy up and pre-hydrate, a concept which I had believed to me mythical. (and will later prove to NOT be.)
Lesson 4: Don't bother trying to catch Abs, she is one fast Mo' Fo'.

And the moral of the story: As miserable as I was running (and continued to be throughout the day, alternating wishing to drink water and then to vom it back up) I was glad I did this little outing before the Big Race on the 4th. However, the worst part of the day was not getting dehydrated to the point of fricking hallucination but the sudden death of my beloved Ipod Nano that I had had since 2005. Evidently I sweat so much that I killed the little bugger... I was most disturbed since I refuse to run without music as I can not deal with the sound of my pokey footfalls and labored breathing. I dropped it in a dish of rice in an attempt to draw the sweat out of it to no avail. Since I did not need an Ipod that is also a phone, dvd player, maid, and kitchen sink I ordered (sadly) a pink shuffle... Will I like it? Wait to find out...